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Patience and Intolerance

October 31st 2006 10:44
Patience is a beautiful quality. You see it when mothers wait for children at dance classes or football practice, when teachers explain principles over and over until they are understood, when carers encourage the aged or infirm who can no longer do what they once did easily.

People can test your patience. How do you handle it? With anger? This is not necessarily the right use of anger. How then? With love. What is the best attitude to take to the child (or person) who is testing how far they can go? What is their need at this point? Usually it is to know the boundaries – how far they can go without damaging relationships. What is your best response? Probably it is to tell them the limits and the consequences of going past the boundaries – and then if they do overstep the mark, permit them to experience the consequence. Don’t take it from them because then they will again test your patience seeing that they got away with it the first time.


There is a time for everything, for patience and for intolerance, Intolerance is basically a teacher, because people, having felt intolerance, will often not push that way again. Others will, and should take the consequences, be it gaol or a break in the friendship. They need the consequence in order to learn.

I once had a boarder who wanted to be assured I would not ask him to leave. He had experienced this before and it was not pleasant. I said that I didn’t have any reason to think I would have to do that. However, when he eventually turned up at home for the third time under the influence of drugs I said, ’Well, now I do have to ask you to leave.” It was not something I was prepared to tolerate. Patience is not designed for making one into a victim. It has the creative purpose of waiting for the fulfilment of a plan or vision. Another boarder had a very energetic child with a musical gift, so it was delightful and worthwhile to teach that child, patiently directing his energies, and see him progress.

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To Abort Abortion.

October 28th 2006 05:05
How much do people know about the possible aftermath of abortion?

If you agree that abortion is an appropriate option for an inconveniently pregnant woman, would you feel the same way if it were you – or your twin brother or sister – that was aborted? It could have been!

In America doctors and clinics are being sued because they have not fully informed the patients of possible clinical after-effects which can include quite serious psychotic conditions, breast cancer, difficulties with later pregnancies or with becoming pregnant. Then there are the two serious and quite separate issues of guilt and grief. Grief seems to happen as the patient tries to “just get on with life” without grieving the lost child, or with the complexities of grieving over something one agreed to, perhaps under duress of a displeased father or other social pressure..

One member of parliament made a great fool of herself by accusing certain pregnancy support groups of informing pregnant women of such potential difficulties. The current politically correct thing is “pro-choice” which actually means pro the abortion option and pro-choice proponents have not wanted the problems attached to abortion given publicity. However it turned out the breast cancer, psychosis, and fertility problems are most easily verified by looking up medical sites on the internet. They are recognised as post-abortion crises which can present themselves even years down the track.

It is good that the whole discussion has come out in public so the facts can become known. The whole matter will be laid bare at a meeting (free and open) at the Adelaide Town Hall on November 13th at 7.30pm.

A society that embraces abortion, euthanasia, cloning of humans or development of embryos for harvesting of stem cells has no respect for human life. How much further will it go? Soon there will be “dignified dying” programs for disabled, and many other categories of humans. Hitler will rule again! Already 25% of the euthanased people in Holland have not actually agreed to it.

It’s time the nation reviewed the whole abortion issue which costs us about 100,000 babies per year. Not least of considerations should be the stress of a woman under pressure to abort her child. This goes against the whole nature of womanhood, not to mention what violence it does to her body chemistry, and is not an issue easily swept aside. Meanwhile people who would love to adopt cannot get babies and have to look overseas for them.

We should not be hiding any of these facts from our young women.
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The Discipline Factor

October 21st 2006 11:05
I’m interested to know how many people, having been strongly disciplined as a child, actually appreciate that learning experience now. For what reasons do you appreciate it?

I had two very different parents. One was not a good child manager, and not actually keen on having children. Responses to us were irrational, unreasonably harsh and frequent. The effect on my developing personality was not helpful.

The other parent loved us dearly, put a great deal of time into us as youngsters, and I have many fond memories, Never emotionally erratic, if we did wrong we were in trouble and there was no way out. There was no point in answering back or trying to evade the issue. It was simply dealt with and then entirely forgotten. I didn’t, for the most part, feel unfairly done by, or any lasting anger about my treatment. Times of trouble for our misdeeds were actually pretty infrequent and we felt loved. It was a great model.

Thus I had two opposite character builders, one that hurt and one that built some character into me.

The one that hurt meant I had issues to work through later in life. This even worked out well as it gave me understanding that I could get no other way

The other built strengths into me that have served me well.
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Re-inventing Respect

October 20th 2006 03:37
Authority

So Ned Kelly’s a hero. He laughed at authority and set a precedent for the Australian community of the future. Not that it did him a lot of good! What is it with us that we must verbally shred every authoritative structure in our society. Do we realise what we have in Australia


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Zero Tolerance for Tolerance!

October 19th 2006 11:02
Tolerance, as I understand it, means putting up with something you don’t really appreciate, having patience with it, being permissive.

Mostly I remember the word used in the sense of people not tolerating something which was in poor taste. It was never set up as a virtue. Many people would not tolerate bad language, or children being rude, or excuses for avoidable weakness (such as always being late


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A Child Focus

October 17th 2006 00:20
A Child Focus.

As a community we need to focus much more on the training of our children. We need to know what is happening in our schools. There are alarming reports of children in year nine being taught what is virtual participation in homosexual lifestyles. They were asked to write about how they would cope in a homosexual group. They were also told not to discuss this with parents on the grounds that the teachers wanted their own responses. I object strongly to this kind of indoctrination of our children. The homsexual lobby is a small part of society trying to gain not only approval but a total takeover of normal relationships and the sooner we identify their intention the sooner we can respond appropriately. They want equal adoption rights as well as marriage rights. This is patently inappropriate for the children concerned who, having lost their biological parents, need at least an adoptive parent of each sex. They are currently a minority group having a huge impact on media and government. I’m not at all certain that the majority of Australians want to support their agenda and it’s time we spoke up about it. I think we have gone about as far as we should go in accommodating them. We don’t want our children taught that agenda in schools. That can well wait until they are eighteen. I’m tired of having this agenda in my face whenever I go to theatre or watch television. In fact it’s getting that way that I have no enjoyment of it any more


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Many people are complaining that children are so pressured by society that they must go the other way from conformity into non-conformity, or disobedience.

I beg to differ. What I see is that children need to know the limits of behaviour in society. They will, in fact, “push the buttons of parents” or stretch the limits as far as they are permitted. If they are not restrained they will actually feel neglected and uncared for and become rebellious and angry. If they are restrained, and the family climate is highly communicative (has lots of time for the children and interested in their activities and concerns) then the children don’t have so much need to rebel against conformity, but rather they are able to work with the adults around them and achieve their goals


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A Non-conformist?

October 12th 2006 13:22
I came across a discussion of conformity and non-conformity today. It wa stated that there is so much stress to conform applied to children these days that they must be non-conformists in order to beat it.

I beg to differ. Every child in history will try to push the limits with their parents in order to discover what those limits are They will continue to do it until limits are placed upon them. If no limits are placed upon them they will keep pushing and pushing and grow angry because no-one is paying attention


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My Turn.

October 11th 2006 13:26
Yes. One day it will be your turn! One day everything you have done will come flowing powerfully back at you to give you a great clout over the head. If you have done wonderful things the clout will make you drunk with joy! If you have done selfish and seedy or violent (disrespectful) things the clout will knock you down and out for the count! You may think you can get away with things, but they will all come back to haunt you.

The Bible says it in so many different and interesting ways


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Truth and Reality

October 9th 2006 05:13
These days many people like to think there is no absolute quality about truth, that it is whatever one likes to believe, or whatever “your truth is”. Certainly there is no absolute value about “Whatever you believe” because it is entirely self-centred, just an imaginative dreaming with no basis in reality.

But what if we said the same thing about the laws of nature, that they are whatever I believe in, or whatever my truth is”. That would be laughable, because the law of gravity, for example, is clearly not subject to whatever I believe. It is a reality that we have to deal with, as is every law of physics. We can’t change them, ignore them or misunderstand them. Whatever we think, or believe, they are operative. All we can do is find out about them, which we do by observations and repetitive testing. Once we understand these physical laws, we can use that knowledge to design things like aeroplanes and nuclear energy sources


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Riding High!

October 5th 2006 13:58
The most powerful part of our personality is perhaps our emotions. They are often the real reasons we do things, even though we think we are being "Oh, so rational". Let me say that being rational is a most rare phenomenon!

If we allow emotion full steam in our lives we'll race around looking for immediate gratification at the expense of future planning If we tie them up too tight we become insensitive or numb to those around us in need, lacking in compassion and hurting those close to us


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